My First Ministry

I believe it was John Maxwell who first introduced me to the concept of losing freedom while increasing leadership. Maxwell said it in some snazzy easy-to-remember way, probably seven words or less, but I can't remember now :-)

But I do remember the point: As you gain visibility and leadership you also lose personal freedom. The guy who changes oil down at the station and visits your church every once and a while doesn't concern himself with people watching him at the grocery store. Pastors, on the other hand, know all too well that people in the community are always watching.

I remember the day I stopped in at my bank, the teller was bubbly and just a bit too cheery when she said, "I saw your wife at the Winn-Dixie last week. She sure had those kids under control." Hmmm...so the pastor's wife can't even take the kids to shop without being on a twisted version of candid camera? That's when I knew Maxwell was onto something.

My daughter and I had a similar conversation recently. We were discussing the plight of president elect Obama's daughters. While I'm sure there must be many advantages to growing up while dad is the president, there must be disadvantages as well. I wonder if President Obama will ever be able to take his daughters for an afternoon drive? Will those girls ever really have dad alone? Will they feel they have his undivided attention...the way young girls require? These were the questions we pondered, and I tried to communicate to my daughter what Maxwell said about the cost of leadership.

Balance is often difficult to achieve. The desire to lead and influence people in a positive way must be countered by the needs of family. My pastor, yes I have a pastor too, told me years ago that my family is my first ministry. He told me, "When you are as old as I am you will not care about the many good things done in church circles if you have sacrificed your family in the process."

For me, listening to the wisdom of my pastor and other leaders like Maxwell has taught me to say no more often. I've had to say no to some churches...to some opportunities....to some positions for the good of my family. I've found it true, they are my first ministry.